"The truth is, unless you let go unless you forgive yourself unless you forgive the situation unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward"
A new season is upon us which means new changes. What are the questions I will be asking myself? What will I be working on this year? Most importantly, What will I be letting go of? Or more so, what do I need to let go of? This week I’ve done a lot of revisiting and reflecting on the past year and have been focusing on these questions. This is what happens when your semester is over, and you have a lot more free time on your hands! For me, it’s scary having all this time to sit and think because of the kind of thoughts I have. Instead of wallowing in them, I decided to digest them and figure out why do I hang onto my pain. Why is it that I have trouble letting go?
"Pay attention to your patterns. The ways you learned to survive may not be the ways you want to continue to live. Heal and shift."
I'm aware of it, I speak of it, and sometimes I make attempts to fix it, but then end up reverting back to the same behavior. For most of us, part of the reason we hang on is due to comfortability. We fear what we don't know, and so we cling to what we know. Why change when you have gotten this far? However, I also noticed that whenever I feel threatened, I almost instantly go back to my old behavioral traits. I either retaliate coldly, isolate myself with my thoughts, or I tear myself down in some way. All of these behaviors stem from stuff from my past that I never took the time to process, so they grew into something bigger. But as I said before, "I've made it this far, so why should I change?" Being comfortable with my past self doesn't mean I need to continue living this way. This also applies to leaving a relationship or outgrowing someone. How could it be that the person you thought was made for you no longer is? Most of the time, the hardest part about moving on is wrapping your head around the fact that you have to move on from something you just became so familiar with.
Maybe if we looked at letting go as something natural and positive, it wouldn't hurt so bad. We can't expect to grow any further if we are still trying to water dead plants. I guess the best advice I could give to myself and you... is to do our best when it comes to training our mind to form new thoughts, pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones, and learning more about ourselves. But most importantly, to realize that letting go doesn't have to hurt. Letting go doesn't have to be scary, because the truth is it will all be okay, and we'll all be okay.